Regina's story

 

 

My name is Regina, a lot of you may not know me. I have been reading and recommending ER for about 18 months now.

Well I really don't know where to begin. I have been married to an A for 32 years, yes that's right 32 years. I have raised two of our children and they have now both graduated college and are doing great. As I said, I have raised them because who knows where he was as they were growing up.

I worked full time all these years because I HAD TO and if you stay with an A you will have to also. I have been very unhappy for about 25 years, but I was going to FIX him and everything would be better. I saw him through drug and alcohol recovery 25 years ago after he had already lost many jobs, wrecked many cars, hit me many times, punched holes in walls many time, and just made my life rotten. But I was the good Catholic wife who was going to keep this sham of a marriage together and I was going to FIX HIM.

The dry drunk lasted for about 4 years—it was almost as bad as his drinking. Well, years went by and I came to hate him more and more, but I was going to FIX him. He busted up the dining room furniture into little pieces, took the cranks off the windows so I could not let fresh air in the house, never gave me money, took my name off HIS checking account and I paid all the bills for many years.

Now don't get me wrong; he did hold down a very good job for about 7 years—and boy don't you forget it! It was then that it became worse. He put me down, called me the C word, spit on me, threw water on me, and everything else. But I was going to fix him. But as it turned out, I was the one who needed fixing.

On July 9, 2002 I had a Cerebral Aneurysm, and thank God I am still here to tell the story and try to help those like you. I have always wanted to be a nurse, but I could never go to school because I was the main breadwinner and bills had to be paid, even though he seemed to be buying, boats, 4 wheelers, snowmobiles, lawn tractors and everything he wanted. I never bought anything for myself.

Well, I left this Alcoholic on June 23, 2007 and I had nothing in my van except my emergency clothes—which by the way I have always carried in my car for at least 30 years because you never know when you will need to play a disappearing act in the middle of the night.

I am now 52 years old, and guess what? I am now fixing myself! I start Nursing School on October 29! I am so happy! I have a very nice apartment; I bought furniture at a thrift store and it is all beautiful, and I was even allowed to have my dog here with me. Things are going so good in my life! I go to sleep at night and am not afraid that some monster will wake me up at 4 a.m. with some rage in his eyes only to start yelling about who knows what.

So girls and guys you all can do it. If I did it after 32 years, anyone can do it! Don't wait as long as I did. I don't know if it did any damage to my kids; they both like to drink. But I am not sure if they got that from him or just from college. I do not drink and never have. Please if anyone would ever like to talk, please feel free to contact me.

Regina

amishchic@hotmail.com